Thread by @cdetler

1/thread: Had a brain-shattering convo with a teen about #pronouns. I think many adults poo-poo 💩 the topic, but I [an adult by any measure] have some alternative thoughts🙋.

2/thread: Alot of what the teen said was hard for me to understand. Ie, sometimes the teen prefers she/her; other times they/them. I was like, "How do we know which? How do YOU know which?" 🤔I could understand why older, set-in-their-ways folks wouldn't at ALL get it👀.

3/thread: But THAT thought--how older generations were raised with pretty linear🙈, narrow🙉, "accepted roles" 🙊(for men & women; for Americans & "foreigners," etc) made a💡turn on for me.

4/thread: I'm not of a generation that is super-restrictive as far as who can do or be what, but I'm 2 gens older than today's youth. Seems to me each generation tends to get more #woke, closer to accepting people AS THEY ARE, no judgement👸👼🤴👳👶🤖...

5/thread: and if that's true, today's teens' discussions of pronouns are like, a next step in that evolution. Ie: if prior generations had been socially free to consider more notions of who & how they are, maybe we wouldn't have just "he" 👖 & "she."👗

6/thread: Reminder: 5 tweets back I was like, "I don't understand her/their POV." I'm not someone with an agenda; I'm someone trying to understand humans.😘

7/thread: Thinking on prior generations not having social permission to even CONSIDER anything outside of he/she [& for many, if it's not socially acceptable, it's not even a THING. It's less real than the boogie man], I wondered, would I have called myself straight-up "she"?

8/thread: And here's, like, my #comingout party: I realized, maybe not. I've always known I'm not a will-o-the-wisp, easily-frightened, big-man-please-help-me "typical" female. I've always said, "I think some women have more testosterone than the average woman. I'm one of them."

9/thread: "...That's why I prefer boxing & weight lifting over ballet. That's why I'm not afraid to walk at night alone in dark alleys. That's why I'm never afraid to voice my opinion. That's why I don't shutup & let the man talk."

10/thread: When I was younger, it made me insecure. Why didn't I get asked to dance💃? As I got older, it made me confident: IDGAF what you think, because sheep🐑 are boring. Finally a @fakedansavage column gave me a name for it: I'm a female with masculine swagger. Okay, boom👊.

11/thread: (For the record, I think my husband fell in love with me for my take-no-shyte 'tude. He's strong enough in his self-perception that he wants a partner who challenges & interacts with him intellectually, not one who yes's, "serves" & (gack) "obeys." I got a good'un.)

12/thread: So in my convo with this teen, I said, "Huh. For 1/3 of my life I went by my middle name, the gender-neutral 'Drew,' because it felt like a more accurate fit than 'Cyndy,' a cheerleader's name."

13/thread: Then I got this big headache & went to 🛌because it's all so hard to think about. But when I woke up, I had this slice of an idea: maybe gender is on a spectrum, like Autism. & maybe my genetic/psych makeup is somewhere north of the far-far feminine end.

14/thread: & maybe TONS of adults are somewhere in the middle, just not so far they've felt compelled to dress/live as another gender. But maybe if they'd had pronoun options as a socially acceptable option in their formative years (or GOD, if being #trans was 👌)...who knows?

15/longest thread ever created: So yeah. Maybe us adults need to open our minds & ask teens to explain their thoughts/feelings/realities. On pronouns & everything else. Because maybe we're not too old to learn after all. & maybe they know what we're too blockheaded to understand.

Bet you'll❤️this thread about teens, gender & pronouns. Would 💜a RT! @ParkerMolloy @RuPaul @TransDivaChandi @Emma4Change @lavernecox @LenaWaithe @Caitlyn_Jenner @xychelsea @laurajanegrace @Carmen_Carrera @ChazBono @candiscayne @FallonFox @janetmock @GeenaRocero @jazzjennings_

#trans #queer #LGBTQIA #gayboys #gaysoftwitter #QueerEye2 #transman #transforsure #les #Transboy y'all might like this thread....

Hi @threadreaderapp - Will you please unroll this? Yes, I say please when speaking to an app.