At first the quote from #HenryCavill regarding #metooMVMT just annoyed me because it reinforced the ridiculous notions I hear constantly from men and trivializes the lived experience of people who have bravely spoken up...
...but here is the OTHER thing that is annoying. The way the media talks about the #metooMVMT in relation to men whose sexual misconduct has been exposed. We all know language matters. Look at this language from the article on #HenryCanvill
These headlines and quotes are just a few. I’m sure if there was actual research done there are hundreds more like this. I wish I could really make mainstream media understand how dangerous this language and posturing is for survivors of sexual violence and harassment. #metooMVMT
The #1 complaint I hear is that #metooMVMT is a witch hunt like there is some master hit list we are checking off as we ‘take out’ man after man. It’s so FALSE! But people believe what they READ! So if they are reading about ‘take downs’ and ‘snares’ that becomes the narrative
The fact is these people brought THEMSELVES down with their own behavior. The movement is about people owning their truth and releasing the shame associated with sexual violence. That is not a NEW concept. What’s new is that there is some accountability now.
Women have been speaking up for years about harassment and abuse. #metoo has just created cover for those who didn’t feel safe enough to speak up. The movement didn’t *create* the concept of speaking out. it just allowed people to hear us better as a chorus and not a solo.
And be clear there are still MILLIONS of people around the world who are still silent. Who STILL don’t feel safe enough to share their experiences and the mischaracterization in the media is a DISSERVICE to them.
Our work is about supporting survivors by providing resources for healing and action. If in the course of that process a perpetrator is held accountable for their actions - so be it. But our goal is not to ‘take down’ individuals it’s to dismantle systems that give them cover.
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I’ve said repeatedly that the #metooMVMT is for all of us, including these brave young men who are now coming forward. It will continue to be jarring when we hear the names of some of our faves connected to sexual violence unless we shift from talking about individuals [+]
...and begin to talk about power. Sexual violence is about power and privilege. That doesn’t change if the perpetrator is your favorite actress, activist or professor of any gender.
And we won’t shift the culture unless we get serious about shifting these false narratives.
My hope is that as more folks come forward, particularly men, that we prepare ourselves for some hard conversations about power and humanity and privilege and harm. This issue is less about crime & punishment and more about harm and harm reduction.
Survivors please note:
IT COULD BE TRIGGERING TO WATCH
I was taken off guard and I only saw moments of it.
But it’s so necessary to hear her voice. Listen to her story in her own words. There is still SO MUCH false information going around about Cosby. Maybe this will help.
The body cam footage clears #OfficerHubbard of all wrong doing in this case. Based on what we see in the video #SheritaColeDixon was not telling the truth about her arrest.
Her attorney has issued a statement.
But we have to talk...
I want to say a few things before the onslaught of “SEE THEY ALL LIE!!” starts pouring in. Yes, this is awful and the officer deserves and apology. I am definitely sorry for harm it’s caused him and his family.
But also, we’re not just proactive based on nothing.
So...I had a little ‘incident’ tonight and I’m gonna his ahead and share it myself.
I spoke at the U of Akron tonight to a wonderful, generous crowd who put up with my hacking cough bc I’m sick.
During Q&A a woman gets up holding a camera phone on me while asking a question +
She starts screaming out the names Bill Clinton’s accusers and says am I afraid that the #metoo movement has become too partisan and why these women weren’t names as Silence Breakers in Time magazine. By now she’s screaming. +
I say...well I guess I know who you voted for...and then I attempt to answer her question but she starts screaming. So I’m saying “be quiet and let me answer your question if you really want an answer...” but she’s still yelling. So I say ‘lady shut up!’ 😒
I was made aware of this video BEFORE I ever saw it because Tony Robbins people reached out to do damage control within 24 hours. They wanted to “give me context” apparently. I don’t need any. I have eyes. The full video is 11 mins. And it’s gross. Bravo to this woman.
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Oh the video is MUCH worse. His misogyny runs deep. To even repeat that story of his ‘friend’ who wouldn’t hire the ‘pretty woman’ as if it’s the MOVEMENT’s fault and not the sexist man’s fault is all you need to hear. It’s deplorable. But SO many folks misunderstand this work.
And he is clear that he won’t apologize so it is what it is. If you choose to keep supporting him it’s with full knowledge of his views on women and survivors.