Thread by @irateloki

My wife will not let me name the child after Robert Mueller and that makes me sad.

Guys this was a joke. We’ve had the name picked out since before our first child was born.

Also, Robert is my first sons middle name.

12 hours to go.

My company just came out with a new Parental leave policy for non primary parents so that’s exciting!

The nurse at the hospital spent more time talking to my wife about russia and me than she did about the baby lol

There was just a different baby emergency and the C-section has been moved back to 11

Also, I have a whole bunch of stories nearing completion.

And it has been moved back again

They have opened up another OR for babies because it is crazy right now - and we are still on a wait

Also I am starving but I’m not eating because my wife can’t.

I’d never last on naked and afraid.

I’m currently being tortured with “the price is right”

People have to pay taxes on these winnings right? A lot of these people seem like they might be poor and unprepared for that

Now, my wife is sleeping. The TV has CNN!

Trump removing security clearances is the thing dictators do.

Mattis is on TV disputing Trump? Where has he been

Side note: Big Brother is the one reality show I watch (tradition with my late aunt) and holy shit this season is full of morons.

Still hasn’t started. Lots of emergencies.

Watching the Goonies.

New baby not Named Robert Mueller will be entering this world with a big brother whose second middle name happens to be Robert (two middle names run in my family)

And yes I know. I married someone way out of my league. Still not sure how I was able to make that happen.

Update: Due to multiple emergency births and an apparent gap in the shifts of the anesthesiologists, it looks like the 1030am c section could be a 1030pm one.

#Itshappening

Ben was born into this world yesterday at 6:11 PM.

He is going to be your 2060 Presidential Nominee.

If Trump doesn’t destroy us first.

#MuellerTime

It’s also worth noting that the pre op nurse who knows me (and apparently reads my twitter) heard that we were delayed hours and came into work specifically to deliver our baby - and then went home.

Ok. This might be the most precious thing I’ve ever witnessed in my entire life.

And yes I know I’m biased.

Two middle names runs in my family.

I’m not sure when it started.

I’m the only one who got stuck with weird names though.

Who names their kid “Patrick Lloyd Vaughn Simpson.”

I sound like I’m British royalty or something.

I mean, yeah, they came from family but I can’t even remember who they are because it’s so distant.