BREXIT AS SEEN THROUGH THE PRISM OF 100 FRIENDS

"Right, who wants to go to dinner? Hands up for yes.... Hands up for no... OK, 52 of you want to go to dinner so we are all going!"

NO VOTERS: "Wait a minute! We don't want to go!"

LEADER: "Tough. We're all going on Thursday!"
HALF OF YES VOTERS: "Erm, we don't want to go on Thursday."

LEADER: "Shut up. Everyone voted to go to the Italian on Thursday."

*Leader rings Italian restaurant*

ITALIAN RESTO : "Hello"

LEADER: "Hi, I'd like to book a table for 100 on Thursday."
ITALIAN RESTO: "Ah, sorry. We are shut."

LEADER: "But we will be coming on Thursday"

ITALIAN RESTO: "But we are shut"

LEADER: "We are still coming. We voted to come."

ITALIAN RESTO: "That's nice. We're still shut though. So you can't come."

LEADER: "I'll call you back"
20 YES VOTERS: "You stick to your guns! Italian on Thursday it is! If not, we can no longer be friends"

LEADER: "But they are shut"

20 YES VOTERS: "You stick to it! Italian on Thursday!"

LEADER: "OK, I'm sticking to it!"

NO VOTERS: "Hi! We still don't..."
LEADER: "Shut up! We are going!"

35 YES VOTERS: "Does it have to be Italian?"

20 YES VOTERS: "WHAT DO WE WANT? ITALIAN! WHEN DO WE WANT IT? THURSDAY!"

BORIS JOHNSON: "PHWOAR! Italian totty!"

EVERYONE: "STFU BORIS!"

LEADER: "Italian on Thursday is what everyone voted for"
BORIS JOHNSON: "Cripes! That Italian is where all the Muslims go!"

EVERYONE: "STFU BORIS!"

*Leader gets back on phone*

ITALIAN RESTO : "Hello"

LEADER: "Hi, I'd like to book a table for 100 on Thursday."

ITALIAN RESTO: "We're shut. I've already told you that."
LEADER: "So you are sure you are shut?"

ITALIAN RESTO: "I don't want to be rude but do you realise this is making you look a bit stupid?"

LEADER: "So we *can* come on Thursday? Is that what you are saying?"

ITALIAN RESTO: "Still no. I can do next Saturday but it's dearer."
LEADER (to YES VOTERS): "He can do next Saturday?"

42 YES VOTERS: "HOW DARE HE DICTATE TO US?"

10 YES VOTERS: "Seems reasonable. Do we not all risk looking stupi..."

LEADER: "Shut up!"

BORIS JOHNSON: "Musl..."

EVERYONE: "SHUT UP"
10 YES VOTERS: "Look, we're not sure we want to go to dinner at all. It seems like a bit of a mess and we look stupid."

LEADER: "WE. VOTED. TO. HAVE. ITALIAN. ON. THURSDAY."

NO VOTERS: "Nobody voted for that."

10 YES VOTERS: "They've got a point. Can't we just ask again?"
LEADER: "No!"

*Leader gets back on phone*

ITALIAN RESTO: "You again?! If it is the same question, the answer is still no!"

REPEATS UNTIL THEY DECIDE TO STOP LOOKING RIDICULOUS AND CHANGE LEADER & POLICY.

#StopBrexit #PeoplesVote

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Oct 9, 2018
Google+, you burst on to the #socialmedia scene like a comet. A rubbish comet in a fermement of amazing comets but a comet nonetheless. As others said you were wonderful & important, selling their services on the back of you, I said you were rubbish. I take my share of the blame.
As you became a wasteground, we continued to see the charlatans say you were a vital part of the #socialmedia spend. You weren't. #Search was always more important - along with the other social networks. #Google does so many things so amazingly well but this was never one of them
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Oct 7, 2018
Right. I'm going to say it. Ready?

@theresa_may is right.

The #PeoplesVote is the Politicians' Referendum. And here's why ...
Different countries use referendums in different ways. At one end of the spectrum, we have the lovely Switzerland who have decided they want a system of referendums for just about everything...
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BRITISH CITIZENS LIVING IN THE EU27. THIS CONCERNS YOU!

@theresa_may's awful government will not go the distance - it will fall and there will be an election - possibly even a #PeoplesVote. REGISTER TO VOTE NOW! Let's have our revenge!

gov.uk/register-to-vo…
If you have been living abroad for less than 15 years, you can vote. All you need is your last UK address and your national insurance number. It's simple. No forms, no finding people to sign stuff or make declarations.

It literally takes two minutes.

gov.uk/register-to-vo…
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You didn't support us. You threw us under the bus. Now we get our turn. 👍

Enjoy!
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Let's learn from history.

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And now @theresa_may will assert her considerable authority...
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