Thread by @AutisticFemb0y

So this month I'll be posting a lot about Selective Mutism, as October is #selectivemutism awareness month.

I'll start with this. Hi, I'm Lilo!

At age 3 I started preschool. Mom told the teachers I had speech problems (by which she meant I didn't annunciate properly)

When I never spoke in class, the teachers assumed these were the speech problems my mom was referring to, so they didn't mention it

It wasn't until months later that it was casually mentioned that I didn't speak. My teachers thought I was entirely nonverbal.

It was then my mom learned I'd never said a word outside my house.

Within 24 hours I had an appointment with the school diagnostician and got a Selective Mutism diagnosis.

Now, a little over 20 years later, I speak most places. But it's never been easy.

My pediatrician had never heard of the disorder when I got diagnosed.

She went to a special conference on selective mutism just for me.

It's a very rare condition. Many doctors and teachers don't know about it. This is why awareness is so important.

So... What is #SelectiveMutism?

Let's start with this - it's not a choice.

"Selective" implies to many people that a choice is being made not to speak. However, this is not the case.

The "selective" part refers to selective situations, NOT a selective decisions.

In other words, people with SM are only nonverbal in SOME situations.

This does not, however, mean the person (usually child) chooses to be nonverbal.

It is a complex and severe social anxiety disorder

It's not shyness. It's more extreme than that.

People with SM become so anxious in certian social situations, that they lose the ability to speak

A child can easily choose not to speak one day.

NO CHILD can consistently decide not to speak anytime they leave the home. No child would choose that. And even if they would, no child has that kind of self control.

SM is charecterized by repeated and consistent failure to speak

This is different than nonverbal Autism, in which children are consistently unable to speak or thoroughly communicate in ANY situation.

Children with SM can communicate perfectly fine in some situations, but consistently fail to so so in others.

Another common myth is that SM is a form of "mild autism"

This is not the case.

They are two separate conditions. SM is an anxiety disorder, not an Autism Spectrum Disorder.

While one can experience SM symptoms and be autistic, many kids with SM are otherwise typical.

Currently it is in the DSM V that Selective Mutism cannot be diagnosed in autistic children, because autism better explains nonverbal behaviors.

I respectfully disagree. Selective Mutism was my first diagnosis, long before my Autism diagnosis. I feel both are correct.

I experience both. Sometimes anxiety causes me to become nonverbal and I have SM symptoms.

Sometimes overload and processing issues cause me to become nonverbal, and I relate more to the autism symptoms.

I experience more than one way if becoming situationally nonverbal.

When I am experiencing overload, I cannot translate my thoughts into words. Someone can ask what I'm thinking and I literally don't know how to explain it.

When I'm experiencing selective Mutism, I know exactly what I want to say, but I can't say it. I can't make the words come.

If you think selective mutism is a choice, I want you to imagine a four year old, crying silent tears, and sitting in pain from holding their bladder so long.... But being unable to ask an adult to go to the bathroom. Eventually they get to a point where they can't stand.

If they stand up, they will wet their pants.

And they still can't ask.

They get home and Mom asks why they were crying. They tell her they had to go potty.

I had accidents until I was 13 because asking permission to go to the restroom was so hard.

You really think a 13 year old will choose to wet themselves in order to... Be stubborn? Make a point? Be a bad kid?

#selectivemutism

If you've never tried desperately to dry your pants off with the bathroom hand dryer, while crying about your failure to perform basic human functions properly... You have no room to talk.

If anyone has any questions about Selective Mutism, I'll gladly answer them.

#selectivemutism #selectivemutismawarenessmonth #smawarenessmonth #socialanxiety #mutism #nonverbal