Anand Ranganathan Profile picture
May 14, 2016 64 tweets 38 min read Twitter logo Read on Twitter
Shameless @CNNnews18. This is a 2011 photo, of not London or PoK but J&K - Corbis id: 42-19885773. (h/t @nitingooti)
This is unending. Now @IndiaToday uses an image of @airindiain for a story on @EGYPTAIR. (h/t @KanchanGupta)
HUGE. Unknown to all, Defence Minister @manoharparrikar has been holding another position, that of @ICC chairman.
Could've sworn this is not the Pachauri we have all come to despise. Still, a good shave is known to work wonders.
Well, if Mugabe can roll back the years, and gender, and skin tone, anything is possible in this Brave New World.
Whatever next. "Ab tak Chappan actor Amit Shah to hold an election rally in UP soon"?
Hold your horses, @BDUTT. The real exclusive has been scooped by Scroll. So Vadra, as it happens, is also a dictator
Dear @TheHindu, it was NOT @MaryamNSharif but her DAD Nawaz Sharif who recently underwent an open-heart surgery.
Who says smoking weed is illegal in India. Collect your sachet at the nearest Huffpost counter. (h/t @diptakirti)
Meanwhile, the problems for @thetanmay just reached an altogether different level.
Wrong to have @ArvindKejriwal 's image accompany this incomplete headline. CAG is talking of financial year 2014-15.
Terribly sad news if true. Please keep us posted of this unfolding tragedy, @IndiaTodayFLASH. Thanks.
When the usual @indiatoday handle operator takes a smoke break and @aroonpurie is kind enough to step in for a bit.
An independent media house explains the difference between a Chamcha and a Journalist. (h/t @ravigupta00)
Horrendous choice of metaphor. Unfazed shamelessness.
Always knew spokespersons lead a busy life. Now waiting for @sambitswaraj to unveil Knight Rider poster.
Meanwhile away from the Terror Sympathisers, here are the Error Sympathisers (h/t @Shalabhg)
To get inside the plane leaving for India by climbing the stairs backwards.
*Challenge accepted* (h/t @ChotaChatri2)
Actually, @ndtv, the PM isn't climbing the stairs backwards to get inside, you've used the wrong image. YET AGAIN.
To be sure, Mr Surjewala does look a little worried at having skipped his parole. (h/t @kiranjankalar)
And I thought Nawaz Sharif was going to be ousted by the Pak Army Chief and not his own daughter. (h/t @ravigupta00)
Odd. The German Jihadist appears to be posing with heads satisfactorily attached, to be honest. (h/t @santaracounty)
Always knew the real adversary of @upadhyaysbjp was President Erdogan and not @ArvindKejriwal. (h/t @merabharat2011)
Crazy. Why is @IndianExpress using the Godhra S6 coach image for the Bhopal-Ujjain Terror story?
Confused. Is this the photo of Donald Trump or the White House intruder? (h/t @theeyerr)
.@theeyerr Calm down, everyone. The government has only cancelled the NGO's Marriage licence.
Good that @NPCI_BHIM alerted ET. Their next tweet was going to be of an exclusive interview with the @adgpi chief General Qamar Javed Bajwa.
I'm afraid this is a fake, photoshopped image. Ideally, you should delete it.
BIG BREAKING: Tavleen Singh joins @livemint as editor; approves a 2012 image of Grand Canyon as Mars. (h/t @rosksh)
So Gopalkrishna turned out to be a Gandhi with gun. Shame. (h/t @The_Hawk_Eye_)
All one can say is, thank god Ms @smritiirani hasn't yet seen how @TheQuint projects elected heads.
Can see Jinnah & Gandhiji in this iconic photo, but Liaquat is missing. Why on earth have you cropped him out, @timesofindia? (h/t @ram_k27)
Times change. Back in the old days, bridesmaids used to throw dandelions over their shoulders at the cheering crowd. (h/t @aravind_vangala)
Hope Ms @SushmaSwaraj recognises @akshaykumar's contribution in diffusing the #Doklam crisis through Kung Fu diplomacy. (h/t @kukerite)
Last heard, he was Syed Chisti, not Saint Christi. Unless he saw the light and got saved in the interim.
This is Pakistani military, @RealRediffCom, not Chinese military. Not yet, at least. (h/t @mombiezombie) m.rediff.com/amp/news/repor…
When @republic has only one photograph for every Ishrat Jahan. Let's hope they have one each for Narendra and Lalit Modi (h/t @JaiSharma__)
Straight from the Ramanujan School of Journalism. They say the same man doubles up as Ndtv's Chartered Accountant. (h/t @coolfunnytshirt)
Good news. @yadavtejashwi would be moving into @narendramodi's 7RCR bungalow. The PM we have all been waiting for. (h/t @krishnakant_75)
And here is Einstein himself with all his worldly possessions swimming away as fast as he can from Indian journalism. (h/t @gopilalith)
#BlueWhaleChallenge creators discussing its fallout as Amit Shah discloses to Modi that he's seen Advani's tattooed arm. (h/t @singhakh)
Could have sworn it was a woman who became our Defence Minister. Shameful how quickly people change after taking oath. (h/t @iInhibitors)
Always knew this Warnakulasuriya Patabendige Ushantha Joseph Lalunayeka Prasadasuranga Yadavendra was up to no good. (h/t @samosawadi)
Handle operator: Sir, what image should we use with this cricket news?
Editor: Wrong'un.

(h/t @kim050301)
Sri Lanka Today. (h/t @nareshgan)
Nice for @republic to use the image of a sartorially swadeshi BJP leader as Google has removed all images of the real one. (h/t @duzzender)
Awful of @CricketAus to have kept this a secret. You can say Goodnight Vienna to Australia's chances now. (h/t @nareshgan)
Always suspected from their in-flight service & Russian pilots, that Spice Jet was owned by the Kremlin and run by Putin. (h/t @sagarpatild)
Hum kya chahte, iPhone 8. Zor se bolo, iPhone 8. Steve hum sharminda hain, Lava, Samsung zinda hain. (h/t @SsupHolmes)
Took me ages, but I think I finally know where our errant news handles get their inspiration from. (h/t @blitzerr11)
So now @narendramodi is laying foundation stones even for airline schemes. You call this Maximum Governance? Shame. (h/t @sriharshakb)
Don't be surprised if Arnab's five year-old son anchors a debate on @republic soon. "FORGET PAPA, *I* WANT TO KNOW!" (h/t @UnSubtleDesi)
You sure, @newsX, that Dev's Devils suffered zero loss? Think they lost to the Windies & the Aussies in the round-robin. (h/t @AASHISH8294)
Relieved. For a minute I thought Polanski was coming up with a sequel to Rosemary's. (h/t @coolfunnytshirt)
Strange. Tejpal looks a little different. Glad he still sports a beard, though, or he'd be unrecognisable. (h/t @myogiaditayanat)
TOI reporter: Sir, @PandaJay has written on teething troubles in-
Editor: Don't trouble me. Use any pic showing teeth. (h/t @anuraag_saxena)
Speedy trial redefined by @aajtak. (h/t @molarcannine)
Trump is insane, esp when the jury is still out on whether Puerto Rico can be helped through mass infidelity. (h/t @HariPrasad91)
This when Mrs Piramal hasn't shaved for a week. Imagine her state if she doesn't pick up Mach-3 for a month. (h/t @anandmahindra)
Much needed treaty. The nation of Ludhiana is notorious for sheltering anti-India elements. (h/t @KirtivardhanD) indianexpress.com/article/india/…
Should I go for fiscal consolidation or pressing the nuclear button? Let me shave first, says @narendramodi. (h/t @coolfunnytshirt)
Change of heart, change of ideology. (h/t @jabir007s) *
When you had two photos that represented gas production but misplaced the ONGC one. (h/t @hum_bolega)
The leaders of two murderous cults (bottom right) congratulating each other at the lessening of competition. (h/t @greatbong)

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More from @ARanganathan72

Sep 21, 2018
A clarification within 3 hours of the explosive Hollande quote, when normally it would take weeks. Tells you the seriousness of the allegation. Much more clarity is needed, both from the Indian and the French governments, including documents that prove otherwise. This. Is. Big.
Only one story could begin the primetime tonight, that of President Hollande - the man who signed the Rafale deal with @narendramodi - and his EXPLOSIVE claim. Only one.

@ndtv, @IndiaToday carried it. Good on you.
@timesnow, @republic, and @CNNnews18 did not. SHAME on you.
True. But this isn't the point right now. After all, remember Mukesh's infamous words - "Congress toh apni dukaan hai"? The point right now is to ascertain if BJP Anil ki dukaan hai. GOI must disprove Hollande's claim at once and with documentary evidence.
Read 4 tweets
Sep 18, 2018
You have GOT to be joking. Please tell me this is fake news; the ludicrous banners photoshopped. Have to be.

What @Iyervval said in his Konark clip was CLEARLY in sarcasm & jest, evident from his very next tweet where he admitted he was joking.

Can't believe this is happening.
These fruitcakes don't know who they are dealing with. @Iyervval would probably egg them on to make sure he is jailed and stuffed inside a striped jumpsuit. Then he will tweet on the nuances of prison cuisine from inside.

STOP this nonsense and get to work. #IStandWithAbhijit
Just heard that @Iyervval has been detailed by @DelhiPolice. He isn't answering his phone. Going to Nizamuddin police station to enquire about this UNBELIEVABLE happening. Stay safe, Abhijit, all of us are with you.
Read 4 tweets
Sep 17, 2018
Stop. And Ask.

Hullo, @nsitharaman, stop! And answer my question.
1 day. 1 lac views. Coming up tonight, another explosive #StopAndAsk.

We, the people, are the real masters. We can stop our sevaks and we can ask them anything.

Had requested two Congress leaders to give their two minutes for a #StopAndAsk. Unfortunately they had to decline - Mr S was travelling while Mr M was busy in court appearances. Will keep trying.
Read 4 tweets
Sep 10, 2018
“I do not permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man; she must be silent.” (1 Timothy 2:12; The Holy Bible)

“Slaves! Submit yourselves to your masters with all respect, not only to the good and gentle but also to the cruel.” (1 Peter 2:18; The Holy Bible)
If a man rapes a woman not engaged, he must pay 50 silver pieces to her father. Then he must marry her. (Deuteronomy 22:28-29; The Holy Bible)

The man wasn't created for the woman; the woman was created for the man. (I Corinthians 11:8-9; The Holy Bible)
If a man lies with a married woman in the city, stone her too, to death, as she cried not. (Deuteronomy 22:22-24; Bible)

Wives! Submit yourselves unto your husbands. Husband is the head of wife like Christ is the head of church. (Ephesians 5:22-24; Bible)
Read 4 tweets
Aug 15, 2018
Our Kerala needs our help. Just contributed to the Chief Minister's Distress Relief Fund (Transaction id: 822715002811). I stand, as do all Indians, with Mr Pinarayi Vijayan, in this difficult hour. Every little helps.
In times of great calamity, all Indians come together, irrespective of language, religion, or ideology.

Also come together in such difficult times those who dream of nothing else but the break up of India, along linguistic, religious, or ideological lines.

IGNORE the latter.
Eighty-four and a half years ago to the day, a DEVASTATING earthquake of magnitude 8.4 struck Bihar. Upwards of 30,000 died. One man called it a DIVINE CHASTISEMENT sent by God for our SINS.

That man was Mahatma Gandhi, the Father of our Nation.

Such thinking is BEYOND VILE.
Read 4 tweets
Jul 28, 2018
Now reading @gchikermane's 70 Policies that Shaped India - 1947 to 2017, Independence to $2.5 Trillion. Jargon-free and meticulously researched (700 citations), this promises to be the go-to indispensable guide for policy-makers and laymen alike. PDF: orfonline.org/wp-content/upl…
On to Chapter 10 of @gchikermane's utterly engrossing book - frank admission: I never thought reading government policies could be so riveting - I pause, and reflect on this particular DISASTER - Air India nationalisation. If only @narendramodi could be gifted this book. If only.
The brilliant economist and friend @harshmadhusudan said recently that India would be a $ 12 trillion economy in ten years. Nothing would please me more, but I sincerely doubt that.

At every crossroad to us afforded, we have taken the wrong turn. We have made a habit of it.
Read 4 tweets

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