Thread by @MikeStuchbery_

Alright guys, I'm doing it - I'm gonna walk through Bury Park. This is an area that Jayda Fransen, Paul Golding & Tommy Robinson claim is a 'No Go Zone', completely overrun.

I walk down the side-street leading to the main strip, past two young men in traditional... Muslim dress. One turns to the other conspiratorially:

"Yusef, you deserve to be treated better than than that by her."

I pass the local mosque. The air is unearthly still and quiet. What malfeasance is being born here?

I try to take a picture but it as if the sinister darkness swallows it whole. Or, maybe just the night time.

At last, I am in the belly of the beast. But where is everyone? There are just spicy pizza hawkers playing their trade.

No sinister crowds of bearded men eyeing my warily, no flocks of women in abeya milling about submissively.

It's too quiet.

I am withdrawing money for next week's bus ticket. I will see if I am charged the 'jizya' that infidels are placed under in areas of Sharia law.

I am not charged the 'jizya'. How odd. Surely this area would be ripe for such a sinister foothold.

These two young ladies have not covered their hair! What is this madness? Should I warn them that this is an area under Sharia law? They put themselves at risk of a stoning at *any* moment!

I have been swindled by a shopkeep into buying sweets and hot peppers for my wife as she is fond of both. There was no haggling. None at all. Just courtesy. Horrible, intoxicating courtesy.

Now hang on just one fucking minute. These mannequins' shoulders are bared. How dreadfully immodest!

Guys, I think I've been lied to.

Shit. I bought some Naan. I can't help myself.

What the hell is this? Churches? In the heart of Bury Park? The community completely claimed by Jihadists? I am perplexed! I am agog!

We'll this is disappointing. No sideways glances, no hissed curses, no roaming gangs of young men telling people what to do.

FFS, I haven't even heard any other languages than English!

I've literally run out of Bury Park to walk. I've tried desperately to find anything intimidating or threatening.

It's just a local community hub, with Britons of all colours sharing what makes their background special.

To be honest, I felt more threatened walking to the bus stop in Dunstable.

So, hey, listen, next time @MarkACollett, @TaraMcCarthy444, @LauraLoomer, @TomiLahren, @PNehlen, @RaheemKassam @KTHopkins, @TRobinsonNewEra, @PrisonPlanet, @CaolanRob or any other Crowdfunded Racist shrieks at you about #NoGoZones, tell them to *massively* get fucked...

...whenever these chucklefucks talk about a #NoGoZone, they're shitting on communities that just want to do their thing, sell some delicious naan and prosper in a free and democratic country.

Bury Park, like much of Luton is a testament to what the world has given Britain. It stands alongside Carnival as a reason to come to this town. It's colour in the grey, flowers in some rather gloomy postwar cracks.

We're all here for such a brief moment in time - way too short to go talking shit about other because we look, eat and pray a little different.

Look after one another, god (or not) bless & smile. FIN.

PS. Thanks to Mr @DanKaszeta for the inspiration. Give the man a follow - he ventured into #NoGoZone Tower Hamlets yesterday!