Thread by @gsurya

#WhenYouAreRahul your internationally reputed college will publicly confirm your MPhil Degree.

When you are #DufferModi your college will block RTI for your "Entire Political Science" degree, which no other student got 🤣

#WhenYouAreRahul you dont have to be afraid of press or audience, and can bravely handle any question without pre-screening.

When you are #MeekModi you will only talk to bootlicking sycophant journos through pre-screened questions.

#WhenYouAreRahul you will respect your opposition and their necessary role in a democracy.

When you are fascist megalomaniac like #DemonModi you will rant for an opposition mukt country & use CBI, media and other institutions against them in your lust to retain power.

#WhenYouAreRahul you are trusted, respected and loved by women of the country as they see you as a friend and ally.

When you are #TharkiModi who will abandon your family and snoop on a girl half your age and then say that her father asked for it to be done. #Saheb #snoopgate

#WhenYouAreRahul you choose the best possible leaders for respective positions in Govt, like Sonia Gandhi did, who take informed decisions.

When you are a self-obsessed megalomaniac like @narendramodi, you will carry out demonetization because some RSS idiot like Bokil said so.

#WhenYouAreRahul you will privately practice martial arts, bicycle for long distances and work out intensely to keep fit & healthy.

When you are a #Feku like @narendramodi - you will pretend to do mild Yoga publicly on national TV on #YogaDay

#WhenYouAreRahul you will even apologize for shameful events like 1984 anti-Sikh riots which you yourself had nothing to do with.

When you are @narendramodi you will proudly take out a "Gaurav Yatra' across the state in which you presided over massive riots as CM.

#WhenYouAreRahul you secretly help victims like #Nirbhaya 's family out of love and empathy.

When you are #NeechModi - you publicly offer 1 cr to martyr Hemant Karkare's wife while 26/11 terror attack is still going on, but she still proudly rejects it.

#WhenYouAreRahul and are asked about your religion - you will say 'The Indian flag is my religion'.

When a Sanghi like @narendramodi is asked this same question, he will reply that he is a "Hindu nationalist".

#WhenYouAreRahul you can eloquently say "Wind Energy" and "Mrs Sirisena" in an extempore speech.

When you are #DufferModi you will say #WeedEnergy and "Emm Arr Ess Sirisena" even from a teleprompter 😁

#WhenYouAreRahul you embrace all minorities towards your vision of an inclusive, progressive and secular India.

When you are @narendramodi you call Muslims 'tyre puncturewallas', taunt 'hum paanch hamaare pachhis' and compare 2002 riot victims to puppies crushed under a car.