Marc Kissel Profile picture
Mar 30, 2018 22 tweets 16 min read Twitter logo Read on Twitter
And LAST but not LEAST of the #EliteTrait, we have #1 seeded Doedicurus clavicaudatus vs. #2 Amebelodon fricki!!! #2018MMM
Tonight's battle is a 3-way collaboration by me, @PKurnath & @tinkeringprim8, so hold on to your tush! #TeamAwesome #TeamDiscoveryChannel #2018MMM
Doedicurus a.k.a. #TankMammal has taken out the Jugulator, Thalassocnus catans, and Andrewsarchus mongoliensis, while Amebelodon a.k.a. "shovel-tusker" has defeated Deinogalerix koenigswald, Homo floresensis, and Dimetrodon limbatus #winning #taxonomicmouthful #2018MMM
None of these battle outcomes have been at all controverisal. Some are saying they are the best MMM narrations of all time #truth #2018MMM
This battle takes place in an urban park. Specficially the Gateway Arch National Park, a 91-acre park in St. Louis, Missouri. It is home to the Gateway Arch! #2018MMM
The #TankMammal didn't have many predators besides humans (Prado et al. 2015). One study of the remains of another speices of glypto (de los Reyes et al. 2013) showed it was scavenged by an ancient #TrashPanda relative from the Order Procyonidae. #FossilizedReenactment #2018MMM
#FunFact: the study of what happens to a bone from when the animal dies to when it is studied is called taphonomy #SATWord #2018MMM
While #TankMammal has never met Amebelodon (they existed ~4 million years apart), other members of the elephant-like Family of Gomphothere did live in South America, probably entering during the Great American Interchange (Sanchez et al. 2014) #WhichWouldBeAGreatBandName #2018MMM
#TankMammal weighed in at 2300kg (10 kilostoats), while Amebelodon tipped the scales at ~9,000kg (41 kilostoats, #TotesStoats). So neither exactly blends in to Gateway Arch National Park (note: image not to scale) #StoatsAsMeasurement #2018MMM
Amebelodon spots the #TankMammal first in the park. As neither of them is adapted to this human-built (a.k.a. anthropogenic) environment, they are both on edge. #2018MMM
Amebelodon thinks the park is only big enough for one ANTECESSOR. In fact, today's young male elephants entering musth (science-speak for a period of highly aggressive behavior) have been known to kill rhinos!! (Slowtow and van Dyk, 2001) #2018MMM
The shovel-tusker approaches #TankMammal, who is still just trying to eat a meal in peace. #2018MMM
#TankMammal has not yet encountered anything so large during the competition. Once it senses the large proboscidean's presence, #TankMammal decides the sit-and-wait-it-out strategy is its best defense. #2018MMM
Amebelodon, not the sit-and-wait type, sizes up the giant boulder. It likely used its shovel-shaped lower tusks to scrape bark from trees, a behavior seen in modern elephants as well: #2018MMM
But scraping won't do here. With trunk raised, Amebelodon stabs tusks at the side of #TankMammal, digging its lower jaw into the soft ground of the park. #2018MMM
Pushing the top of #TankMammal with its trunk, Amebelodon puts all its might into moving the hulking beast. #2018MMM
Elephants today can move literally tons of material with their trunk ALONE (! Researchers are still investigating how elephants moderate the strength of their trunks for light&heavy loads (see recent article by @IFLScience #2018MM
This load is heavy for Amebelodon, but with a giant THUD, it successfully rolls #TankMammal onto its back! #2018MMM
#TankMammal is now in an extremely unusual and vunlerable position. It is having a hard time getting back onto its feet because its joints are so sore. #2018MMM
Turns out glyptodonts could get arthritis!!… #science #2018MMM
Amebelodon turns his head to examine his overturned foe, and whines in pain. A slight tear has begun in the masseter muscle attaching the lower jaw to the skull. #2018MMM

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More from @MarcKissel

Mar 27, 2018
Next up: No. 2 ranked Amebelodon fricki vs. no. 7 ranked Homo floresiensis!!! #2018MMM
In the first round Amebelodon sent Deinogalerix koenigswald flying through the air, while Homo floresiensis outwitted the tiny Palaeoloxodon #2018MMM
Amebelodon is a member of the Gomphotheriidae family, a group of extinct elephant-like mammals. Whether all the species currently placed in the amebelodon genus are descended from a common ancestor (e.g., are monophyletic) or not is a topic of some debate #2018MMM
Read 18 tweets
Mar 23, 2018
NEXT UP: #4 Tasmanian Devil Vs. #5 Water Deer!!! #2018MMM
Tasmanian Devil (Sarcophilus harrisii) devoured the ghost bat in the first round, while Water Deer (Hydropotes inermis) managed to scare away the solenodon (none of this was controversial at all amongst the fandom...) #truth #2018MMM
The T. Devil is 6-8kg (that's 27-36 stoats for those of you playing at home) and can catch mammals up to 30 kg. The Water Deer weighs in at 9-14 kg (40-63 stoats). #stoatsasmeasurement #2018MMM
Read 17 tweets
Mar 20, 2018
NEXT UP: 8th seeded Bristol Fox (Vulpes vulpes) vs 9th seeded Racoon (Procyon lotor) #2018MMM
Our penultimate battle of the night (written mostly by
@chumblebiome) features two members of the taxonomic order Carnivora, which means they have a specialization for eating meat: #carnassials. Skull images from @NMNH #2018MMM
However, being part of Order Carnivora doesn't mean they only eat meat. Both of these Carnivorans can eat an omnivorous diet consisting of both plants and other animals. This makes them highly adaptable to many different types of environments! #UrbanJungle #2018MMM
Read 20 tweets
Mar 15, 2018
NEXT UP: #5 seed Water deer ((Hydropotes inermis) vs. #12 seed solenodon (Solenodon paradoxus) #2018MMM
The Water Deer ranges from China to Korea, but has been imported to the UK and other parts of the world. The name refers to its preference for coastal plains, marshy areas, & riparian regions (map from: #SATword #2018MMM
Unlike many other deer they don't have antlers, their GREAT ADAPTATION are *mostly* in their mouth: The upper canines are "saber-like," which makes it look like something out of Bunnicula (Deernicula?) #2018MMM
Read 14 tweets

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