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The ironic thing about being the victim of sexual assault, is what you remember. You spend years trying to erase it from your memory, and no matter what you do...the memories always comes back.
I was sexually assaulted the first time when I was 8 yo. A 10 yo boy tried to have sex with me. He laid on top of me and he tried to insert his flaccid penis into my vagina. It didn't work, and because it didn't work, I learned for the first time something was "wrong with me".
It felt dirty. I can still easily recall the feelings of embarrassment, horror, and blame...I was 8.
