Thread by @elonjames

I’m sure if there’s a better term for what stage my kid is in but the only way I can refer to is “the shits.”

Because we’re in the shits now.

#DGProper

This A.M I had to put the kid on timeout multiple times. And she’s doing this new thing where I ask her to do something, she ignores it or does the EXACT opposite. I tell her she now has to deal with the consequence and she then yells emphatically “I LISTEN. I LISTEN.” #DGProper

My wife & I keep telling her you can’t retroactively listen. You can’t do ridiculous shit and then when I’m like “dafuq?” you scream “I LISTEN.”

THATS NOT HOW THIS WORKS CHILD.

#DGProper

So this morning she’s doing the most. And everytime she crosses a line I put her on timeout and she freaks out. She’s mad in the car and then threw a kick.

Really child?

So I opened her lunch box and removed her (favorite) yogurt in front of her.

YOU GON LEARN.

So now she’s pissed. We go into daycare and she wants nothing to do with any kid. Her bff runs up to her and I’m not sure if she remembered rhe apple sauce and ball incident from yesterday. But he goes to touch her...

Her:

She won’t deal with anybody. The teachers the other kids, ME. She’s done with all of us.

Her BFF comes over & we start playing a game where we use her lunch box as a drum. The other kids all come over and the entire class is surrounding me dancing and drumming.

Us:

My kid:

I finally stop the rave dance party that’s broken out with me and the rest of the class. I give high fives to all the kids and I say “Bye Sidney, I love you.”

Sidney: