Thread by @UchennaNG

One day my brother @TheycallmeCOBY called me to meet him at the set of a movie shoot, as the backup actor who always covers up when an actor messing up - I gladly went!

"I have to go" I told my friends as I grabbed my phone & headed to the set location!

Awon Goons Mi😭

Thread

Immediately I left ikeja to head to gbagada I got a phone call from KK - "that girl you like is in my house now" he said, I told him I was in a hurry & would 'branch' his house when I'm through

I hurriedly found my way to the location, I asked what my role was & I was told

I was to lie to the girl & she would slap me thrice, "Why wouldn't the main actor abscond?" I thought..

I agreed to play the role for the love of the art;

We rehearsed & it was soon time to shoot, I said my lines & immediately she slapped me the light in the room went off!

"Cut!!" The director said & we all went at ease, the room was dark so we just sat down - "is it Nepa that took light?" One of the light boys asked his colleagues & he said yes!

"Ah! Problem dey o, we no get gen" he said & everybody in the room exclaimed at once

"You say wetin?"

They started to explain how they forgot to put the generator in their van; so they came to the location without it, while others on the set worried about different things I was worried about getting slapped over & over again;

I sat down to think for a while & I received an SMS..

Progress!!

"How far, I dey go Ikeja go drink beer with boys, you go come?" He said, I didn't think twice before responding;

"I'll be there live" I replied..

"Light dun come back" one of the cameramen said as the room suddenly received illumination!

"Alright back to work!"

We got back to work & before we continued shooting this girl taps me - "just to be sure, you're Uche right?" She asked, I paused for a few seconds;

"Uhm yea" I slowly replied, as I tried to ask her why she asked that question I heard the director scream;

"Tape rolling!"

"Hian"

We soon finished shooting & it was time for me to leave, I bade everyone goodbye & as I stepped out I saw my ex Lizzy - luckily she didn't see me so I kept moving.

I needed to meet up with KK who has harbouring my crush at his place;

"I dun dey come" I said to KK

I took a bike to his house in & few minutes I was at his street, I looked to the direction of his house & saw him walking out with Felicia - my crush!

"KK!" I screamed from the top of the bike, "Where are you guys going to?" I asked as I got down to pay the bike man.

I paid the bike man & caught up with them, "hi Felicia?" I waved with a smile - she smiled back & my heart melted;

"This is love at 2nd sight" I thought, the first time we met I liked her & we were cool - I was immediately convinced that I was in love & 'mumu button' had come on

"I'm fine" she responded as we all walked into the joint KK had initially intended for, he asked where I was & I told him.

We got in & got a table, Felicia sat beside me & I started to talk to her - few seconds into our conversation she received a phone-call;

"Hello?!"

"Hey dear where are you?" She subtly asked as she picked the phone; "who's her dear?" I thought, she rounded up the call with describing where she was & I knew it was her boyfriend she was calling

"Why she gonn do like that?" I wept as I turned to KK who was busy ordering drinks

Felicia & I got back to talking & in few minutes I'd told her about my life ambitions & passions, she barely let me know her as she did most of the questioning.

KK was drinking & talking to his girlfriend on the phone, I was aside with Felicia & we were all having a great time

"Felicia baby!" A voice suddenly screamed from behind me, I turned back & there was this boy standing there smiling

"Oh her boyfriend is here" I thought, "I greet una o" he said as he shook hands with myself & then KK

"Na my guy be this" KK said in a bid to introduce us

He introduced himself as Samuel & turned to Felicia;

"Baby how're you doing?" He asked, "I knew it!" I accidentally said out loud & everybody turned to ask me what was going on;

"No! Na football matter" I immediately lied to cover up, I knew none of them were football fans

"How would this boy just come & ruin my almost perfect day?" I thought, after receiving several slaps on set & struggling to relax with my crush I now had to deal with heartbreak

I started to psycho-analyse the scenario & thought of my next move, I decided to 'play it out & see'

I had barely finishing gulping my beer when Samuel started to brag about his family, he laid claims to several relatives of his holding high positions in the government - "is that why she's with him?" I started to ask myself..

Suddenly!!

Felicia stood up to go ease herself..

"Is there someone at your place?" Samuel asked KK, KK told him he had guests at his house & that was why he initially brought Felicia to the bar

"Why you ask?" KK asked & he told him he needed some private time with Felicia

"Then get a hotel"

"I no want hotel"

"Ehen?"

"Ehn"

I tried to block my ears from hearing the conversation, "see this boy wants to go and Mekwe my crush" I wailed inside; "may you not get that privacy in Jesus name" I casted & binded

I knew God doesn't listen to such prayers when KK told him about RoomsNG where he could get rooms

He gave him their website to check & a number to call, while Samuel tried to call RoomsNG Felicia returned & he immediately changed topic;

"I love acting, I came to Lagos to chase my acting career" Samuel said to KK as Felicia sat by him, "Yes he's a good actor" Felicia added..

"Is it because he's a good actor she likes him?" I thought again, "Oh baby I can act too" I silently said to myself to avoid further problems

"Why not talk to Uche?" KK said as they finally looked at my direction, "Who?" Samuel asked

"Him" he said pointing at me;

"This guy?"

Samuel looked at me & looked at my hands, he saw me holding a bunch of keys - "I no know say you be chairman, na your Jeep be that?" He asked with a mischievous smile

I wondered what he was up to a bit but instinctively responded;

"na my house key, na bike I enter come"

Okada?

He turned to KK & told him He needed people that could help him, I concluded he was a social climber & kept quiet.

Felicia turned & started to talk to me;

I felt the Lord was finally on my side so I didn't want to be a disobedient child

But The devil had plans;

My phone rang!

Progress calling...

"Why is this boy always on my case everytime?" I thought, "it maybe important" I thought again - I picked

"Where you dey?"

"I dey KK side"

"Shey you been dey Stevo side?"

"Yes"

"I dey there now, dey run dey come"

"Wetin dey happen? Hello.. hell"

I looked & realised he ended the call, I told Felicia I had to head to ikeja - "Oh my house is in ikeja" she said

"Perfect"

I looked up & told KK I had to meet up with Progress, "I get visitor I for follow you" KK replied & I told him it was fine

"Samuel let's go" Felicia said

I maintained total silence as I walked with Felicia & Samuel, when we got out we got a yellow-cab & all three of us sat at the back seat

"Ikeja, but me I go stop for computer village side" Samuel said to the driver, "One-five" the driver responded;

"Oga dey go" & Felicia said..

I got no chance to talk to Felicia as Samuel had sat in-between us & placed his focus on her, I was with my phone so I just went through my mails

We soon got to medical road & Samuel had to leave, he got down & waved at us - I waved back & the driver drove off!

I was finally alone with Felicia for the first time, it became awkward at first - all we did was smile at each other & said few words of pleasantries..

I suddenly heard slimcase shouting at me - "Ji! Masun!"

I sat up to properly engage her but before I proceeded my phone rang!

Progress!

"I dun almost reach" I said as I picked, he ended the call but I could hear music at the background - there must be beer I thought & suddenly started to smile;

"Why are you smiling?" Felicia suddenly asked, I woke up from my slumber;

"I think a party's going on"

She asked where & I told her, she then said that she didn't want to get home 'early' so I asked if she would like to come with me;

"Do you want me to come?" She asked & I said yes..

"Okay!" She said with a smile on her face;

"You're seriously gonna come?"

"Yea, let's go"

I directed the driver to Steve's house & in no distant time we were there, we got down & as I dipped my hands to bring my wallet I couldn't find it;

"Jeez! Where's my wallet?" I exclaimed, "what's the problem?" Felicia asked;

"..Uhm it's nothing, uhm I think I lost my wallet"

"Have you checked inside the car?" She asked, I opened the back door to do a thorough search but I didn't find it.

"Oga me I dun dey go" the driver said as he zoomed off, "did you pay him?" I asked Felicia & she said;

"Thanks"

"Nah it's nothing"

I walked to her & we went in..

"Uchman the hitman!" Progress screamed as he saw me, I walked in & greeted the other guys & girls who were already in the spirit of the groove!

I introduced Felicia to them & they immediately made her feel special, Progress got her drinks & food while Steve made her laugh hard..

The party was cool & we all had a great time, it was soon time to go so she ordered a taxi & I walked with her to receive it.

"Thanks for a great time tonight" she said as she gave me a hug, "here's my number call me" she slipped a piece of paper into my pocket..

"Sure I will"

I went home that night feeling victorious; From surviving the slaps on set to battling with Samuel - "I die a happy man if I die tonight" I said as I found my way home

The next day while taking a break from work I called Felicia; she picked, I introduced myself & we got talking!

We agreed to meet up later that evening at a park around the neighbourhood, I tidied up my work earlier than usual & freshened up - I got a cup of ice cream from a store when I called to confirm she was already at the park;

I took the bus & met up with her;

"Hello"

"Hello"

I was happy to see her again & from my reaction I could tell it was mutual, she looked different; this time around I could see the clearer version of 'God's plan' on her.

I handed her the ice cream, she gladly took it & immediately expressed gratitude..

Suddenly her phone rang!

She brought out the phone form her purse I looked towards her direction by reflex;

Samuel calling...

"This Samuel again?" I thought - "what is it this time?" I thought again...

"I've sent the money to your account" Felicia said..

"Sent money to Samuel? Well, e no concern me"

She soon ended the call & returned her focus to me, we got back to having a great time & I remembered my brother had asked to meet for a review of the scene we shot;

"Would you like to go somewhere with me?" I asked Felicia & she didn't hesitate, "cool, let me get a cab" I said.

I took a cab & met my brother at the office, we got there & sat down - I introduced Felicia to him & the other crew members, she was a cool girl so she easily blended with them.

I got us some drinks while we watched clips from the previous shoot on a laptop;

"Is that not Sam?"

I looked to the screen where Felicia was pointing & saw Samuel, "Yes that's him" I replied.

"You know him?" Coby asked & Felicia said yes, "he's a promising actor but after a day he stopped coming, he's not picking too that's why we called you" Coby said.

#StoryTimeWithUche

"Even this actress" Coby added as he pointed to the laptop screen, I looked & realised it was the same girl that slapped me multiple times on set!

As I was about to make a comment my phone rang, I looked to see who was calling & it was my ex Lizzy

"Lizzy? Why's she calling me?"

"Aren't you picking your call?" Felicia said with her tiny soothing voice & I immediately picked up without thinking twice;

"Hey Lizzy" I said & subsequently kept mute, she asked where I was & I told her I was in a meeting; "what meeting?" She asked

"It's none of your business"

"You've not changed" she said, "my friend said she saw You" she added - I asked which of her friends & where I was seen?

"Don't worry you don't know her" she replied, "it's like you're busy" she said - "actually I am, I'll talk to you later" I said & ended the call!

"Abeg Abeg"

Spending time with Felicia at the studio was another level of intimacy, we had bonded so fast that it was looking like I'd won💪

While I was being serenaded by her presence I suddenly got another phone call!

"Oooh why do my village people always have to intervene?" I grumbled!

"I hope it's not Lizzy" I thought as I brought out my phone, I looked & saw that it was Progress - I picked!

He asked where I was & I told him I was somewhere, "You go buy beer for boys?" He screamed & started laughing at the background

"Why is he laughing" I thought aloud

"Who's that?" Felicia asked & I told her, by this time Coby had left just two of us to the laptop as he went about other businesses.

She asked why he was laughing so I took the phone about 5 CM away from my ears & explained the scenario;

"Let's go get drinks then" she replied..

As I placed the phone back to my ears I heard Progress screaming from the other end of the phone; "I hear wetin she talk o, allow her buy us beer o!" He screamed!

"How did this boy hear Felicia's sweet tiny voice from there?" I thought;

"Allow me buy you a drink today" she said

"You friends could meet us at the bar" she added, "yaaay!!" Progress screamed from the other end of the phone - I became weak

"Oya na make we linkup for Cubanna" I said, "I love Cubanna, their fish is nice" Felicia cut in;

"Alright na, Cubanna it is" I said & ended the call..

We rounded up at the studio, said out goodbyes - Coby couldn't go with us so we headed straight to Cubanna.

We got to Cubanna & it was dark already, the bright lights from the walls of the building lit up the place& it looked nice.

We found a seat, sat down & placed out orders.

Felicia & I had finally become comfortable with each other that anybody who saw us would assume we'd been dating for 10 years, "I know almost everything about you but I don't know your house" Felicia said as she looked at me

It then dawned on me that I had never taken her home

"Shit, you're right" I said, "or are you homeless?" She sarcastically said & we both started laughing

"Okay, if you're not in a hurry I can show you my house tonight" I said, "I'm not in a hurry" she replied - "I wanna know everything about you, I mean everything"

"Everything"

I smiled as I got the message under the message, I wanted to reply but suddenly heard someone scream my name from behind!

I was shocked so I turned to see who the owner of the tiny voice was;

Lizzy!!

"What's she doing here?" I murmured, I turned to her & faked a smile

"Hey"

"I see you're here with your girlfriend" Lizzy said, "meet Felicia" I said pointing to Felicia who was already on a phone call, she waved at Lizzy & continued with her phone call

"How have you been?" Lizzy asked as we did a little 'catchup, "Who's the friend that saw me" I asked

"Ehen let me show you her picture" Lizzy said as she flipped through her phone & showed me her photo, "this girl is your friend?" I asked

She asked if I knew her & I said yes, I told her how we met - I then remembered I'd seen Lizzy at the location & it all began to make sense..

"Is that not Faith?" Felicia asked, "You know her too?" I said as I turned to Felicia - "i think I finally recognise her" Felicia said

"This is confusing" I said, they asked what I meant & I told them how she slapped me like we had scored to settle in our former lives

"Really?"

"I think I've seen her with Samuel once" Felicia said, "Who's Samuel?" Lizzy asked & Felicia showed her a photo of him;

"Samoski Benson!" Lizzy said pointing to his picture;

"You know him too?" I asked & she said yes

"He & Faith has been dating since secondary school in Benin"

"I even invited them to join me here" Lizzy added, "You did what?" I asked & she confirmed her initial statement - "are they coming?" Felicia asked & Lizzy said yes

"They're here already" Lizzy said as she looked at her phone which was ringing, she picked the call & waved

Before we knew it Samuel had landed before us holding Faith on one hand, "What's going on here?" Felicia asked as she stood up to Samuel

"I thought you said you were going to pay the director the money & call me back" Felicia yelled, "Is she the director?" She added

"Director?"

"Madam calm dan why you dey shat" Samuel said to Felicia as he grabbed Faith by the waist, "are you okay?!" Felicia replied

At this point I was forced to ask Samuel what was going on, "bros no just involve" he said to me;

"No be you act film half way run?" I replied;

Me?

Yes!

He asked what I meant & I turned to Faith; "didn't you tell him?" I asked her - "tell me what?" Samuel said , he was beginning to look confused at this point

"Wouldn't u say what you know, or are you part of it?" Lizzy said to Faith who was already 'shivering'

"It was his idea"

"Whose idea?" Felicia asked, "baby keep quiet!" Samuel said to Faith - "oh she's your baby ehn?" Felicia said, "are you sure all you be been telling me is true?" She added

"In fact let me even talk sef, see ehn that 500k you gave me is gone!" Samuel said to Felicia as he bragged

He explained how he had been 'playing' Felicia all the while, as he raised his hands in gesticulation I saw him holding a wallet like mine;

"Is that my wallet?" I asked him & he tried to deny, he opened it a card fell off & it was obviously my wallet

"So you're a thief"

At that point he knew he'd been caught so he dropped my wallet on the table & turned to look at Felicia;

"It was nice to know you" he said to her, "all these lies just for N500,000?" Felicia asked;

"You're cheap!"

"We came here in a bus but we're flying back to Benin tomorrow"

"You're flying to nowhere!" I suddenly heard voices say from behind, "You must refund all you've stolen including my phone" another familiar voice added

We all looked at the direction and there was Stevo, KK, Progress and Coby standing - luckily KK had his military camouflage on

"So you think you can just come & steal from people because they trust you?!" KK yelled as he attacked Samuel with a 'dirty' slap!

Samuel fell on his knees & began to apologise, "where's my phone?" Coby asked him & he dipped his hands into his pocket & produced Coby's phone

That was where the cunning journey of Samuel & Faith ended, he was forced to install a mobile bank app & paid all money back to Felicia - he was further beaten & disgraced before a nearby patrol police can & took him & Faith away.

The tension finally calmed & We resumed drinking

Felicia made it rain drinks & nkwobi that night, she kept thanking 'us' for saving her

"Anything for Uche"

"Those are my goons"

We continued having a great time, at the end of the night I ended up at my house with Felicia

I did well to show her the house

And of cos;

Mekwe!!

Thanks for reading and retweeting today's episode of #StoryTimeWithUche

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TO GOD BE THE GLORY

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