Guinevere_Rising Profile picture
Oct 3, 2018 36 tweets 8 min read Twitter logo Read on Twitter
Since I have some new followers, I guess it's time I do an intro thread.

Hello everyone! I'm Guinevere. I grew up as a military dependent for 18 years, moved around every 3 years and settled in Alabama thanks to my dad. I was raised fundigelical (Fundamentalist Evangelical) 1/
and slowly began leaving that world in 1999, when I graduated.

The church that my parents attended at that time was very abusive in many ways, and I tried to leave as best as possible. Unfortunately, my parents ascribed to the Stay at Home Daughter movement, as well as 2/
other very patriarchal/quiverfull ideology.

The only way to leave was to get a job that took me elsewhere or get married.

I decided to work, even if that mean overtime and horrible hours, as long as it kept me out of the home as much as possible 3/
I met my husband online, while not looking for a date or friends or anything like that, and we cultivated a seven-year, long-distance relationship that culminated in our marriage and me moving overseas, mostly to escape my family and fundamentalism, which was killing me slowly 4/
Prior to leaving, I found out that I have an invisible disability called Celiac (Coeliac) Disease, which causes my intestinal villi to blunt (go flat) and stop properly absorbing nutrients. I've had this since early childhood, but it wasn't caught until I was 23. 5/
I found out that this was the underlying cause of all my other invisible disabilities.

Due to horrible health insurance policies in the US, I never got the gold standard diagnosis, although 100% of my symptoms fit & my doctors here agree with the diagnosis. 6/
My parents tell me that they "did the best they could with the information (they) had" - but I know better.

I was around at the time that Homeschoolers Anonymous was founded, and lent my assistance to sharing articles and even writing a couple, but haven't told my story. 7/
I've been asked by a few people why I haven't -- well, it took until this year to cut off contact with my entire family (except my sisters) on social media -- because I knew what the ramifications would be if I told the truth. 8/
I also haven't been ready to let it all out, because it is that complicated and hard to handle, even in flashbacks that come infrequently now.

So, you get to learn along as I can handle letting my story form. 9/
Partly due to an overseas move, and partly due to bullying at school, as well as being partly egged on by the fundamentalist church we attended; I began being homeschooled in 6th grade. Although I requested MANY times to go back to school, that never happened. 10/
My homeschool material was Alpha Omega, and later Christian Light Publications -- both of them from Mennonite Publishing Houses.

My lack of history education was compensated for by my dad giving me history books from the 50s-70s and many, hours-long lectures by him. 11/
I've been making up for my sheer lack of a proper history education ever since I left in 2006.

Not covered in my education: Science, Politics, Social Studies. -- yeah, I'm still trying to fix that. 12/
Due to the various abuses I lived with at my parent's home, I spent a lot of time creating a bubble that I lived in to keep me safe.

I also disassociated *a lot* because there was no escape until I got out for good. 13/
I honestly didn't have words for what I experienced until I got out, because it wasn't safe to know or fight it without a lot of help.

The scariest thing about living in the cult was that the cult operated under the radar so that it didn't raise alarm in evangelical land 14/
& any time I put out feelers for help, I would get the same messages to submit to authority and listen to my parents, surely they had the best in mind for me. 15/
Even after leaving, when I started experiencing debilitating panic attacks and flashbacks, I tried to reach out to my MIL - and found quickly that the cult was under the radar here too & I wouldn't find proper support in family. 16/
I attempted to reach out to the psych community and found that they also had no grasp on the cult, how to help, & what reach they had.

2016 happened. They gained more power. I felt powerless and terrified. 17/
The current US administration is filled with people I literally flew across an ocean to get away from, including my former US Senator, who is now the AG. 😕

I've since found the #exvangelical community, which has been helpful in many ways, but in others, it hurts a lot. 18/
The hardest part is that I don't want to talk about my faith. I've de- and re- constructed on my own. I'm pretty sure of where I stand, and I don't want to debate it, discuss it, or defend myself any longer.

Many are still stuck in debate/evangelize mode. 19/
Here is what I do know now:

I am bi. I didn't know that because I was to be an asexual being until marriage, in which I was to then transform into a beautiful porn star every night for my husband. 20/
I am, and was a feminist. I am still learning my history and role. All of that was stolen from me. It wasn't safe to know things because these women were the undoing of America and Christianity at large. (false, and false) 21/
I'm still learning intersectionality. It makes sense to me, because I was someone who has always lived in an intersection of society that a lot of people can't easily grasp.

I'm still learning LGBTQIA history. All of this was denied me before. 22/
I am a child advocate and peaceful parent.

The parenting methods I grew up with were made illegal in Germany not long after I graduated high school.

If I can do better on this parenting thing, anyone can. 23/
I am an older millennial. All these think pieces -- I can only roll my eyes.

Ya'll. I grew up under the poverty line without knowing it. The government raised my dad's wages so we couldn't apply for aid. -- I know poor. 24/
I now live just above that line again, thanks to a major recession and inability to work.

So, yes, I advocate for kids, assault survivors (I am one), LGBTQIA folx (I am one!), environmental issues, folks living in poverty (hi!), disabilities and other intersectional issues. 25/
Sometimes I will also plug other people's fundraisers and calls for monetary aid. Why? because I know what it is to be poor and unable to meet needs. I don't have $/€, but I can be a voice and amplify for people who may have a few pennies to spare. 26/
I also have my own fundraisers, but due to being taught bootstrapping and other things about asking for help, I get really uncomfortable plugging my needs. However, I do have ways people can help me/us as a family if they want to. 27/
One way to help is my ko-fi:
Another is Paypal:
or my amazon wishlists… 30/
Or our gofundme for a used car. We're trying to get ahead of the diesel bans as our car is too old to be fixed up to prevent being unable to drive in the city. DH said I'm being silly but I'd rather be proactive.…

I try my best not to plug what I need here, because I feel like it's begging. I'm used to providing. I've worked since I was 15. I've paid rent since I was 17. I've had kids now for nearly 10.5 years and I've run my own household fairly successfully for 11 years. 33/
However, I have been learning that it helps to share our vulnerabilities and help each other out, so I'm doing my best to do that and not complain. 💜

Life is too short not to help other people out. KWIM?/
I may do another intro thread on another day, so for now I'll close this out and say it's been nice to get to know you all and I look forward to interacting with everyone who I've followed, and who has followed me.

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