1. END OF WEEK THOUGHT: One of the many, obvious benefits of getting out of the media/Twitter bubble and talking to real people is that you get a much more accurate view of how real people are thinking
2. This week I've spoken with hundreds of teenagers and over 100 parents across UK and hot topic was fear around the male/female interface in light of #MeToo #PresidentsClub #HarveyWeinstein and even #DartsWalkOnGirls #f1gridgirls
3. One woman, a mother of sons, said this, and it genuinely made me well up. "Are today's and tomorrow's boys going to made to pay for the sins of their forefathers?" She told me how she saw her son retreating, he was afraid
4. She said the constant bad news stories about how powerful men have misbehaved is making teen boys terrified. They believe they are part of some problem, when they've never meant any harm. They believe the message all men are capable of evil. This is devastating for young men
5. The point is, this constant media barrage has an affect. We are in a constant attack phase on masculinity, and many young men are in retreat. These are good boys from good homes and it kind of breaks my heart
6. So how do we turn this around? How do we make young men feel they can be part of the solution, not be born part of the problem by dint of their very maleness? How do we talk to them on their terms, without shaming and blaming and before we lose them?
7. Finally, at the other end of the scale, in a Category A jail the other week, I listened to a prisoner read a poem he'd written about "toxic masculinity". He'd never hear it before but looked it up. He knew he'd done wrong in life and is rehabilitating
8. He told how he felt society genuinely hates men, just for being men. He said that if that was the way of the outside world, maybe he'd be better off in here. He said he felt no better than an insect. It was hard not to be moved
9. This message, that men are intrinsically toxic, by curse of birthright, has travelled into schools, jails, workplaces, into every corner of the UK. Precisely who wins? And how do we fight back? Please help me. Sometimes it feels fucking lonely out here
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