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I have had the worse experiences of my life relationship wise and I was resolute to let relationship be. As a matter of fact, I decided I would never have anything to do with any woman again.
Betty was so pushy that I was scared but...
Issa thread #JosiahsThreads
Betty was so pushy that I was scared but...
Issa thread #JosiahsThreads
After 4 failed relationships with all my partners cheating on me and leaving me because I was a gentle man, I eventually met Derinsola during a vacation visit to the Bahamas. Being that I love them thick , the click was sleek. Somehow she feel for me aswell
Derin was the woman of my dreams beyond her gorgeous body, she was caring and super sweet. I was certain we're the dream couple bcos even the devil could see we were inseparable. I thought after the vacation we would break off but we only got stronger & better together.
"If you have faith, nothing can move you, no power wether physical or spiritual can scare you" were the last words that came out of Pst Tunde's mouth when heard "poh poh poh kpa kpa kpu kpu" sound of guns in the terbernacle...
Issa thread #JosiahsThreads
Issa thread #JosiahsThreads
Everybody just went down even before being instructed to do so; the shocking part was that Pst Tunde within this few seconds had emptied his pockets, lying face down & begging that his life be spared.
Pst Tunde is famous for his teachings on faith as a dogged preacher. We've heard so much about him that we even heard he's been shot several times but the bullet didn't penetrate his skin. We even heard he used faith to driver a car with empty tank from Abuja to calabar
The job offer came with a fat 6 digits salary, official house, official car & a paid house help service. I didn't even bother giving it a second thought before I boarded the bus from Calabar to Abuja... I was frustrated when John Said he's traveled
Issa thread #JosiahsThreads
Issa thread #JosiahsThreads
Having been jobless for 6 years, the mouth watering offer that came with the job took away my sense of reasoning. I didn't even bother to call John & inform him I would be staying at his place for the period of the job interview process.
I guess my subconscious mind calculated that since John has never gotten a leave time from work since he started 8 years ago he wasn't going to be getting one now that I was coming.
I sat in the examination halls with my eyes pacing about & my heart praying. I looked at my watch & discovered the 7hrs I calculated in my head was just 13mins.
I concluded it was over for me & I'm getting an extra year until...
Issa thread #JosiahsThreads
I concluded it was over for me & I'm getting an extra year until...
Issa thread #JosiahsThreads
Well I attended an expensive private scho close to the house from my kindergarten days up to my primary school. So far amongst the 8 students I always came first undisputed & everyone was sure I was intelligent except my cousin sister who called me local champion.
She always told my dad that I'm just enjoying the privilege of no competition that if I was sent to a public school I would be beaten hands down 😂😂😂😂
It always sounded funny & unbelievable until one day I got angry & made my dad consider her appeal.
It always sounded funny & unbelievable until one day I got angry & made my dad consider her appeal.
Janet was a thorn in my life throughout my secondary school days. She was big, ugly & strong. I always imagined how I would deal with her but it all ended in imaginations until I saw her 10 years later looking like freshly baked pie👅👅
Issa thread #JosiahsThreads
Issa thread #JosiahsThreads
I transferred to the school from my other school bcos of the same bullying issue. The girl at my other school was bullying me bcos I asked her friend out & didn't ask her out. I had hoped this transfer would be my redemption bcos the lies I told for my dad to transfer me was deep
So when I arrived at this new school, I decided to keep away from girls & mind my business. But being intelligent was the only thing wrong I did. All the girls were attracted to me while I was just doing my thing. Anytime I tried to get my freak on with any of them
I've always thought my choices were wrong but this time it felt too good not to be right. She was against my choice of being a Masseur but I was hell bent on doing that which brings me joy & income.
As I entered, she shut the door behind me & said...
Issa thread #JosiahsThreads
As I entered, she shut the door behind me & said...
Issa thread #JosiahsThreads
Randa and I have been dating for 2years & everyone around us have been expecting us to consolidate things in marriage. She was ready, her family was ready, my family was ready, I was ready but my account balance didn't seem ready.
As a graduate teaching in a private secondary school with a 25k monthly salary, marriage was way out of my budget. Randa is the first daughter of her family from Akwa Ibom & her bride price isn't something you pray about (rara oh). You must have money even if you have faith.
#RantivityThursday
Seriously writing,
There is a huge difference between satire/sarcasm and senseless, messageless and unnecessary jokes!
Sadly, many Nigerians don't understand this.
#JosiahsThreads
Seriously writing,
There is a huge difference between satire/sarcasm and senseless, messageless and unnecessary jokes!
Sadly, many Nigerians don't understand this.
#JosiahsThreads
There are so many issues of national, religious and sociocultural importance that have been sacrificed on the altar of memes and jokes.
This is bcos out of a desire to be funny, many of us have taken to making jokes out of the serious issues, thereby watering down their gravity
This is bcos out of a desire to be funny, many of us have taken to making jokes out of the serious issues, thereby watering down their gravity
If you go online, especially on this app, you'll see memes & jokes making light of infidelity in relationships & marriages. The other day, someone wrote that if having one boyfriend could bring happiness, she couldn't but imagine how much happiness ten boyfriends would bring.
All I needed was a shoulder to cry on but the tenderness of the chest she placed my head on made everything go away. While everything was gradually going away, she added a peck to it & took me inside her compound.
#JosiahsThreads the Pt2
#JosiahsThreads the Pt2
Running away for my dear life was all that mattered now since Ebuka was bent on killing me. I called Stanley my friend in Lagos that I was coming over after explaining the situation to him. He mocked by telling me that it's "bress & yansh" that will kill. He said I could come.
I was able to steal a few clothes from my house since Ebuka & his faction were in guard to get me down & probably take my life. So for the first time since my childhood, I packed myself & headed to Lagos atleast to save face & preserve my life for the main time
So Anita my neighbour's girlfriend came to see on that Monday morning and their gate was locked.
I watched her wait in for almost 2hrs & I could literally see the frustration on her face so I decided to be a good samaritan by opening my gate for her...
#JosiahsThreads
I watched her wait in for almost 2hrs & I could literally see the frustration on her face so I decided to be a good samaritan by opening my gate for her...
#JosiahsThreads
Anita is that kind of girl that causes wahala for all the guys anytime she comes around. The rear kind that has beauty, perfect front & visionary backyard. We created a whatsapp group for guys in the area bcos of her
If you're the first guy to sight her coming you must uphold the Bro & street code by informing us on the group so that we can all take our respective spots to catch a good view of this quintessential beauty. As matter of fact all of us have her pic in our phones
Lagos is a pretty messed up place so this is an experience of a new Lagosian
Issa thread #JosiahsThreads
Issa thread #JosiahsThreads
Things you'd never get to hear about Lagos.
1 . Lagos is not a local government, it is an entire state... People talk about it like the place is small, na lie ohhh. Some people drive 1hr to work every 4am. It's like staying in Effurun and working in sapele. DON'T BE DECEIVED.
1 . Lagos is not a local government, it is an entire state... People talk about it like the place is small, na lie ohhh. Some people drive 1hr to work every 4am. It's like staying in Effurun and working in sapele. DON'T BE DECEIVED.
2. You don't come to Lagos and buy a house in banana island in 1 year. No allow nollywood deceive you. The hustle is real & brutal if you know what I mean.
As I entered the mall to do some grocery shopping, I was amazed when all the guys in the hall started starring at me. I know I'm a fine man but to get the attention of fellow guys was quite something. It was OK until one guy grabbed my butt...
Issa thread #JosiahsThreads
Issa thread #JosiahsThreads
The night before was a battle that I would never forget, our 7 years old marriage was at the verge of collapse and from all indications I am to blame even though I really don't know how all these came to be in the first place.
Ingrid and I were friends for 2years, dated for 2years, courted for 7 months before we tied the knots, and from everything they have told us about best friends being best couples I was sure our marriage was going to be a great success.
This thread is the story of a resident of Bukuru in Plateau state about how these attacks are not new to them. Please take your time to read well and retweet let other Nigerians and the world know that life means nothing in our country right now #PlateauKillings #JosiahsThreads
It was a beautiful Sunday evening and we had all returned from church. As the custom in our family is, all my siblings and their kids came home to see their grandpa, my dad and we were gusting while having dinner.
I heard noises in the midst of our discussions but I wasn't sure because the music from the sound system was pretty loud until we heard the gate bell ring and by the time myself and my brother stepped out to check who was at the gate, we heard several knock and banging
Service starts by 7am but because I spent the better part last night finishing up a story "assignment" for my nephew, I woke up late and got to church late(which is very unlike me).
One of the reasons I like to be early in church is so that I can chose my seat by myself without having to argue with the ushers. When I got t church, there was this fearfully made lady usher at the door who ushered me to a seat.
#Joshsthreads
We trooped in our numbers to the departmental office when we heard that the results have been released. I was happy in my mind because I know I prepared very well for the exams and I was sure I would be one of the best.
We trooped in our numbers to the departmental office when we heard that the results have been released. I was happy in my mind because I know I prepared very well for the exams and I was sure I would be one of the best.
As it so happened, the result board showed something entirely different. I didn’t only fall behind expectation, I had a carry over. Mhen, this broke my heart, center kidney and top right lungs
I was angry because everyone that copied from me during the exams in that course got an A. In my department, you dare not complain about results else you will do a 4year course for 10years.
